I am a major fan of Christmas. I love watching the old really badly animated Christmas movies, I can probably recite all of the lines from “A Year Without A Santa Claus.” I will tune in to the Christmas radio stations to get my Mariah fix with the endless replays of “All I Want for Christmas is You.” I will drive around for endless hours looking at all of the Christmas light displays out front of people’s houses. I will build a gingerbread village. I will purchase peppermint flavored hot drinks from Starbucks. I will even wait in line at the mall to take a picture with Santa when the time comes.
That’s just it. When the time comes. I sh*t you not, yesterday as I was minding my own business putting groceries into my car, I heard a woman in the parking lot say goodbye to another woman with the phrase, “Happy Holidays.” I know it wasn’t directed at me, but I felt personally victimized. IT IS BARELY THANKSGIVING. I’ve just finished mourning the loss of Halloween.
I am a firm believer that the celebration and preparation for Christmas should not begin until Black Friday. Even, that may be pushing it, but it is so ridiculous that stores have been preparing their Christmas displays for over a month now. Just last week I walked in to a store and on the radio was “Simply Having a Wonderful Christmas Time.” More like simply having a wonderful time kicking your Christmas display over if you don’t stop it.
The worst part of it: I told my mom about my distaste for the early holiday festivities, so now she sends me pictures of Christmas light displays in my hometown with the caption “Happy Holidays” every chance she gets. And I know that she just sits there and laughs and laughs with herself over it. How rude.