Picking out gifts for our loved ones can be hard, especially this time of year, when it’s just about the last minute and we’re not quite sure what to buy them. If you are like me, you do something totally random, off the wall, or completely inappropriate. For instance, I gave the vast majority of my friends signed pictures of myself and told them that when I am famous-famous, and not just in my head-famous that the photo/autographs will be worth something and I won’t be mad if they auction them off on eBay.
But, if you are unoriginal and go for trinkets that can be purchased in any, old store, I decided to break down what the gifts actually translate to in the minds of your gift recipients.
A Bath Gift Set: Says to recipient: You smell, time for a shower, or this was the first thing conveniently located in the holiday gift section as soon as I walked in the door at Kmart.
A Stuffed Holiday Plush of Some Sort (Snowman, Reindeer, Santa): Says to recipient: I think you are young at heart and may not be able to receive a gift that I think suits an adult just yet.
Chocolate or Hot Coco Set: Says to recipient: I wanted to get you something, but I was on a budget and these came three to a pack.
A Tacky Holiday Sweater: Says to recipient: I was trying to be ironic, but soon realized that the holiday season is almost over and this gift will be more irrelevant than ironic, but I forgot to get a gift receipt.
Fruitcake: Says to recipient: I want you to be constipated for at least a week.
An Electronic Gizmo: Says to recipient: I like it better when you aren’t talking, please go play with your phone some more.
A Visa Gift Card: Says to recipient: You are f*cking impossible to shop for, figure it out yourself.
This was just a brief list of the possible options, but it’s really okay, because it is my true opinion that any gift at all or even just a simple “Merry Christmas” or “Happy Holidays” means that someone was thinking about you. Even if it is lame and will make you wish they just gave you cash money.
PS. 11 days until Christmas!