I Keep Dancing On My Own

I love to dance. I am a full time, unrelenting dancing maniac. That’s not to say that I’m a great dancer, I just love to do it. And having been to many a dance club in the years since I’ve turned 18, it’s fun to watch other people dance, too. I love to people watch on the floor. It can give you so many ideas of good and tragic dancing. Sometimes I’ll actually just stand there, two-step to the beat and take stock of what’s going on around me. Sometimes it makes me look like I’m bored or not having fun, when actually, I’m just taking it all in.

There are some nights where you show up to the club with the mind set of: okay, I want to dance with everyone, I want every single person in the club to see me dancing and think to themselves; “who is she and how do I hang out with her?”

Then there are other nights where you show up strictly to observe. You want to dance a little maybe, but mostly see the scene around you, maybe talk to some people.

Then, there are nights; they come less often than the other two types, but they are my favorite kind of night. There are the nights where I show up, ready to just feel the music. I find my way to the middle of the floor and figure it out. I dance with myself, if you will. I have zero shame about it. Sometimes I’ll be dancing, maybe I know the song and I am just straight up jamming and someone will try to dance with me. I usually figure out a way to twirl out of his grasp and go back to dancing with myself. I am not trying to attract a partner, I am not looking to be scooped up by someone who thinks that I’m waiting for them. No. I am literally having the time of my life. I am probably super into the song, and the dim lights accentuated by a strobe, and I am just going for it. I don’t need saving. I can have fun without your hot, heavy breath on my neck. I don’t need you hands holding me back. In the moment that the night turns into a “dancing with myself” event, I am so f*cking alive, it’s unreal. It’s a moment to be embraced. It’s a moment that should never be shied away from. It’s a moment when you realize that you don’t need any approval from any other single person in the world to enjoy what you’re doing. You’re in love with the music, you’re in sync with the beat, and you did it, for a second, when the strobe light hits your face or your head tips back just as the beat drops, you know that you really are alive and that you mapped out your own happiness.

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