Okay, so, lying is bad. I will always be the first person to say that. I don’t agree that lying is a good thing, but in some cases I make minor exceptions.
In the case of being at the club, there are just a lot of things that merit a white lie. If some homeboy is all up in my face and I am just not feeling it, I’m going to hit him (not literally) with one of my go-to club lines. I have compiled a list of all of the quick little one liners that I have told to get a guy to stop talking to me.
- I’m engaged/married. (Usually works best when I wear my fake engagement/wedding band, and yes, I have one of those; just in case.)
- I don’t know this song.
- Oh my God! This is my song! *Run to friends and acts like this is the best and my most favorite song that will play tonight.*
- *Straight up act like I can’t hear them.*
- Sorry, I like girls.
- My friends are looking for me, I have to go.
- Yo no entiendo. (Spanish for: I don’t understand.)
- I need some air.
- I’m just about to leave.
- *Points to some tallish/hot/intimidating looking guy nearby.* That’s my boyfriend. (Then casually go up to him, smile, flip my hair and tell him to act natural for a minute.)
- *Points to one of my friends nearby.* That’s my girlfriend.
- I don’t know how to dance to this.
- I need another drink. (Usually, I absolutely do not need another drink and sometimes he’s dumb enough to actually go buy me one and then it’s a Jersey Hustle.)
I mean, normally a guy can take the hint and they accept the brush off. If they don’t and are pushy about it; normally I just tell them that I’m not interested and to leave me alone. If they persist, I dodge by fading into the crowd. If they still don’t give up, I find a bouncer or someone with authority in the club and tattle; because tattling is fine in a potentially dangerous situation. I’m not trying to be physically hurt by a random in a club. Although, it’s only ever come to that once. Dodging trolls is an acquired skill for sure.