Free HBO is Making Me Suspicious

In the last four days, I have taken full advantage of my free HBO subscription. When I did my grown-up thing and ordered my adult cable subscription, this was an adult perk that I received.

Safe to say, it’s making me absolutely crazy.

I have been watching each episode of the Sopranos and have come to the realization that any single person in my life could potentially be in the mob. Specifically, I think my landlord is in the mob, and have told about 15 people that I think so. He is an absolute gem, he is very kind and soft spoken, but everything else seems to make sense.

He doesn’t like to use credit cards: No paper trail.

There are looks on the outsides of all of the doors: Why are they on the outside unless people are being locked inside?

He has a fridge guy on speed dial: Who needs that unless they’re filling the fridges with cement and dumping people in the Hudson River?

Okay, so that’s three reasons. But I’m just amassing evidence.

I’m not even scared though because it’s good to have connections, I think.

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