Never Trust a Man Whose Name Starts With “K”

Maybe it’s a coincidence. Maybe it’s just a rule that I never knew.

But with the exception of one, every single man I’ve “dated” whose name starts with”K” is a total f*cker.

Like, I’m talking mega creeps; crazy, lunatic, psycho assh*les.

Specific case examples:

Case # 1: I had a K-named stalker once. Non-stop phone calls, text messages and double texts even after I said that I wasn’t interested. It came to the point where I was relieved that he had no clue where I lived because I was almost certain he would show up and knife me to death for blowing him off.

Case # 2: I had a K-named d*uchebag who liked to play mind games for a time. He was all about the hot and cold, the old fashioned, I’m gong to tell you that I want more of a relationship but then not talk to you for 2 weeks, then somehow make it seem like it was your fault the whole time.

Case # 3: The only exception to the K-name f*uckery is the one whom I fell out of contact with. So, he is unintentionally a f*cker because I miss him and that might be the worst one. Because Maz doesn’t do feelings.

So watch out for the Kyle’s, the Ken’s, the Kevin’s and the Keith’s because they’re out there and they are ready to ruin your life. (Okay, that’s dramatic, but they will at least ruin your day or week.)

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