What’s good, f*cker?
Have you lived a full life? Are you happy with the things you’ve done? Could you die right now knowing that you left your mark on the world? Because if not, you might want to get those things in line because I’m about ready to kill you.
Nothing is worse than seeing your best friend sad or upset or crying, especially nothing is worse than when it is caused by someone that you know is so not worth their time. Watching them trying to figure out what “they did wrong” makes me want to vomit.
You are just an assh*le who didn’t recognize this beautiful creature lurking right before you, and abide by their simple request, whether it be for space or for more of your time. So, basically, if I didn’t already think you’re an idiot and scum, I certainly do now.
I also can’t tell you how many times I tell my best friend to let you go. And just know, that if they ever do go back to you, I will bite my tongue since you’re already dead to me, but the second you slip out of line, you’re toast. I know people who know people. The Jersey Italians will know your address.
A Supremely Pissed Off Best Friend