Transitioning to Senior Year as Told By the Office

This week on F*ck It Friday, I give you my interpretation of being a home renting senior in college as told by the cast of the hit NBC series, “The Office”.

At first we moved into our off-campus place and having a whole house to ourselves, it was like:


Woo Hoo! No parents!:


It’s all fun, all the time:


You’re living a care-free life, so oblivious to the future:


And then you go to the first party of the year and you’re ready to rage:


Until, you spot a freshman at the bar:


So, you’re like:


Then you see the f*ck boy that you were hooking up with last year and he’s all:


So, you grab the girls and you’re all:


But, your plan is interrupted when you see one of your old friends across the party like:


So, you have to quick, go grab her and be all:


Then the next day she’s saying:


And just to be a d*ck you respond with:




But you all gather around your phones to look through the pictures from the event and you can’t help but:


So you think to yourself:


Then somewhere midway through the first month, in a house of all girls; it gets weepy:


So you have to ask the serious questions:


But then you suggest ordering cookies and watching a chick-flick, and she’s immediately like:


So you’re ready to get back to enjoying being an adult and your freedom until you get your first cable bill:


And when your roommates don’t believe you over how much it is, you’re like:


But it’s okay, because you’re an adult now, you can figure this out:


And now you think you’re ready to get back into the school year, but after day one you’re already:


And the invites to go out bar crawling, to the party or hang out reach you in mass quantities, so you’re like:


Because between classes, extra-curricular activities, social life and trying to keep up with adulthood, it’s a balancing act that you’re just not too sure about:


And now every time you see the mailman, you’re like:


Because you know it’s more bills and you’re to the point where you’re constantly like:


And it might even get to the point where you’re thinking:


But then, you call your parents, tell them how great school is going and how you’re loving everything about this new adult hood, then just before you hang up, you throw in:


And when they actually come through, you’re like:


And you feel alive once more:


At least for another few weeks.


Harsh Realities Faced On Your First Day of Senior Year

I just started my senior year of classes.

Oh my god.

When did this happen?

I’m not so sure. But after being on campus for nearly 20 minutes a ton of harsh realities sucker punched me square in the face:

  • This is legitimately my last first day of school. Unless I go to grad school, in which case, I’m still going to send my mom a picture of my first day of school outfit.
  • I don’t know anyone on campus. You’d think because I’m going on four years, I may have accrued a few friends or acquaintances, but no. Nope. I look around and I see all these fresh-faced youths and I feel like the crypt keeper.
  • My sense of “I care so much about this!” has severely dwindled. I went to the library between two classes to take a nap.
  • It’s only syllabus week. I have not had a single class that has lasted its entire duration. One of them got out in 45 minutes, another in 30 and another in 20. I actually have no idea what my full class load is going to feel like and I am terrified. If I’m already cat-napping in the study room, how the F*CK am I going to make a five class-a-day schedule all the way through?
  • I keep saying things like: “Remember freshman year when…” and “Back when I lived on campus…”
  • After traveling the world for more than half of the year, going back to school is more mundane than having a chocolate tootsie pop. I just don’t want it. I should be waking up in London at noon. Not Philadelphia at 8 AM.
  • I don’t even own a notebook.
  • My rent, cable, water, gas and electric bills all seem vastly more important than buying that book for class. Although I would love to read all about entrepreneurship and world philosophies, I also really want to catch up on Game of Thrones, so…
  • I have approximately 15 months until I have to start paying back my student loans.
  • I haven’t even thought about applying for my loan to cover this year.
  • I have to be a real, full time, no-nonsense adult, super soon. The age of d*cking around and kicking rocks is quickly reaching its end and I have absolutely no idea at what else I’m good at doing.

Someone, anyone, send help.

This Is Some EliteDaily Sh*t

To My Whenever Friend~

I miss you. I miss you constantly. You don’t live anywhere near me. We don’t have the convenience of proximity to go on lunch dates. We don’t have the luxury of cuddling up and watching crappy movies until our stomachs hurt from laughing. We don’t usually even have the time to squeeze in a measly 20 minute phone call to catch up on life because we know that 20 minutes could easily turn into six hours and we both have so much sh*t to do; so we have to schedule a Skype chat two weeks in advance.

But it’s okay because you’re my whenever friend.

I know that you are there whenever I need you. Even if it’s 4 AM and I’m stumbling home from wherever I was and I just need to tell someone about the cute guy that I made eye contact with from across the bar, you usually hit me back within a few minutes. Or if I have a really weird question that I’m too embarrassed to google, you normally come in clutch with the answer, or shamelessly look it up for me.

You’re there whenever I need someone to share happy things with. You’re there whenever I’m sad and need someone to tell me that everything is going to be alright.

And whenever we finally do get to see each other face to face, it’s like we spent no time apart at all. We can d*ck around, we can have deep conversations, we can make confessions that we couldn’t tell each other over the phone, for fear of being overheard. We can make fun of each other endlessly without getting offended and we can give each other tough love when it’s necessary.

Call me whenever. But, that goes without saying. I love you and I just hope that if you need me, you know that I’m your whenever friend too.


Throwback Thursday

I have reason to believe that although, over the past 20 years I have changed considerably, my core competencies and beliefs have remained fairly untouched:



I have a sensitive artistic side.

snoozin' and treats

snoozin’ and treats

I love a good nap.

“Wait, I have to hit the ball with the racket? or do I kick the ball and throw the racket?”

I’m still easily confused by sports.

“Look Ma, no hands!”

Generally a pretty reckless driver.

Choosy Moms.

Choosy Moms.

In love with peanut butter.



Terrified of birds.

“Mom, help”

And children.

I just need a snack.

I just need a snack.

Always ready for a midnight snack.

Hey there, handsome.

Hey there, handsome.

On the hunt for a tall Knight in Shining Armor.

Soft kitty, warm kitty, little ball of fur.

Soft kitty, warm kitty, little ball of fur.

Excellent handler of animals.

“Oh the food goes in the mouth? Oh, I see.”

A dainty eater.

Cheer up Charlie

Cheer up Charlie

Ready to give a pat on the back or a word of advice to someone in need.

Dear God, why?

Dear God, why?

Averse to a bad hair day.

Child Model

Child Model

With outfits on fleek.

Blame it on the Goose.

Get me another, Irene.

And always ready for bottle service.

See what I mean? I haven’t really changed all the much.

Human Energizer Bunny

I have no idea what’s gotten into me, but I feel like I am the Energizer Bunny lately. It’s like I just keep going and going and going.

It’s a great feeling.

I feel like I’m getting a lot done at a relatively steady pace. I’m not staying up the night before the giant paper is due. I am handing it in two weeks early. That’s not my usual routine at all. I am so all about that procrastinator life style. It feels good to be ahead though.

It’s like I have all this free time now that I would have regardless of whether the paper was done or not, but if I just do it, I will have the same free time with nothing looming over my head that I should be doing.

Is this what it’s like to be a responsible adult? I think I like it.