Something Cool that Someone Told Me

You know when someone gives you a cool idea and you like it so much that you want to share it with other people? That’s what this is.

Clearly, you all know that I write a lot, I write to express my emotions and I write to tell stories and a friend gave me this idea, which I believe she got from someone else, but exactly like I said, it’s a great idea to share. So the idea is that when you start a relationship with someone, from the very first meeting write down how they make you feel. Keep it up. It’s like a thought journal, but solely dedicated to one person.

You can write down when they piss you off or when they make you so happy that you could explode. You can read through it if you forget something or need to be reminded of a special way that they make you feel.

It’s just an idea for any of you out there in the beginning stages of a relationship or maybe for some of you that just want to be able to reflect on the relationship that you currently have.

Then, when you finish the journal or the relationship, you have it as a keepsake to remind you of the things that went right and the things that went wrong, or the things that you want to improve in your next relationship.

I just thought that was a really cool idea. And, I know that I write a lot on my blog about men and the things that are going on in my life and I love sharing stories with the fanz that make me happy or laugh or scream, but having a private journal to really open up, you know about the things you don’t want your grandma reading, well that could be extremely cathartic. But mostly, I was just sharing this thought if some of you were looking for a way to express emotions but wanted to keep it personal at the same time.

Never Trust a Man Whose Name Starts With “K”

Maybe it’s a coincidence. Maybe it’s just a rule that I never knew.

But with the exception of one, every single man I’ve “dated” whose name starts with”K” is a total f*cker.

Like, I’m talking mega creeps; crazy, lunatic, psycho assh*les.

Specific case examples:

Case # 1: I had a K-named stalker once. Non-stop phone calls, text messages and double texts even after I said that I wasn’t interested. It came to the point where I was relieved that he had no clue where I lived because I was almost certain he would show up and knife me to death for blowing him off.

Case # 2: I had a K-named d*uchebag who liked to play mind games for a time. He was all about the hot and cold, the old fashioned, I’m gong to tell you that I want more of a relationship but then not talk to you for 2 weeks, then somehow make it seem like it was your fault the whole time.

Case # 3: The only exception to the K-name f*uckery is the one whom I fell out of contact with. So, he is unintentionally a f*cker because I miss him and that might be the worst one. Because Maz doesn’t do feelings.

So watch out for the Kyle’s, the Ken’s, the Kevin’s and the Keith’s because they’re out there and they are ready to ruin your life. (Okay, that’s dramatic, but they will at least ruin your day or week.)

I Met My Soulmate and It’s Not Harry Styles (Even Though He’s Still in the Running)

I never knew that I liked the word “cute.” I always took “cute” as a miniature insult, like “oh, well, she’s cute, but in a little sister type of way.” Or basically, when I call a guy “cute,” it usually means, well yeah, he might be good looking, but he’s probably doofy or awkward or not someone that I would ever pursue, but if my friend is into him, good for her, I guess, even though I think she could do better.

Little did I know, that when a guy calls you “cute” they usually actually mean it. After some intense research and confirmation from some guy friends, I found out a boy’s definition of cute:

Cute [kyoot]

Adjective.

A girl who is potentially girlfriend material, one who you not only find attractive physically, but are drawn to the way she carries herself, be it her smile, her laugh, or her sense of humor. A girl who is cute is someone that you would like to know for more than a night.

Imagine my surprise when I am minding my own business, chatting at a table with my friend, discussing our plans for the rest of the night, when a group of guys begins to walk past us. At the tail end of the group, there is a guy who catches my eye. He had dark hair, a perfect sense of style, and a certain glint in his eye when we made eye contact.

I turn back to my friend to keep up with our conversation, when the next thing I know, hottie stranger is approaching me. He took my hand in his and tried to use a chat-up line, after he finished his line, he pulled away and waited for my response.

Now, we were in a very loud corridor, the music was blasting and I had absolutely no idea what he said. So, in all of my gracefulness, I yell, “WHAT!? I’m so sorry, I couldn’t hear you over the music!” I obviously knew what he was trying to do, but it was kind of fun to make him re-evaluate his approach. I love when I can throw the guy off his smoothness and see how he will recover and this particular guy had my most favorite recovery of all.

He replied with, “Here I am, trying to chat you up and you’re totally ruining the moment. I can’t say it again, it just won’t be the same!” He knew what I was doing, just like I knew what he was doing and it made the whole moment even lighter. So I laughed and implored him to try again. And he does and it was hilarious, and I laugh even harder. And that sparks a conversation. He realizes that I am American and is somehow impressed over how “humble” I am. Apparently most American girls parade around screaming their nationality and how they personally know and have partied with Obama and Beyonce.

I cracked a few jokes after that, we had some mutual flirting and witty banter, then he dropped the “cute” bomb. He, and I quote, said, “You are so cute. So f*cking cute and I just can’t get over it, you’re so cute.” And I sat there and blushed like a six year old. (Mind you, I have never been called cute in a good way before. I’ve gotten some other colorful words, but never cute.) And he continued to say it over and over again, and I would blush some more. Like, I don’t blush. Not ever. Not for anyone or anything. I’m a fairly shameless person and I don’t get embarrassed easily, so the fact that I literally blushed totally annihilated any chance I had at being cool. I have never met a guy who could demolish my cool factor, I’m like a damn cucumber, there’s nothing cooler than me. (And I also don’t know how he thought I was humble…) But after I gave up trying to be cool and just let the conversation flow, we talked for a while and all of his friends had left him, so he had to go catch up with them. I went to say goodbye, and since obviously I’m off my game here, I tried to shake his hand. He grabbed my hand and pulled me up from the chair I had been sitting in, and hugged me. (He was a pretty good hugger too, that’s an important quality for a soulmate to have.) There was no exchange of number or anything like that, no expectations made, but instead he turns and starts walking backwards. As he’s trying to catch up, he yells, “How long will you be in town?” and I reply with, “a few more months.” And since he’s walking backwards, he bumped into the wall and I started to giggle, and he shook his head and starts to smirk and says, “so f*cking cute” again, and then he smiles and says, “I know I will see you again.”

UGH. Heart stop palpitating please. Like, could it get any more perfect than that? Is my life a movie yet? Actually it will be if I ever run into him again. That’s how I will know that we are actual soul mates. In the off chance that fate brings us to meet again, we’ll probably just get married on the spot.

Am I reading way too much into this encounter? I’m going to go with “Yes” for $500, but it’s fun to just be a ten-year old with a crush. And I just needed to gossip about it. Thanks for being my gossip buddies, fanz!