An Open Letter to Maz~

Hey girl- what’s up?

So…

Da f*ck were you thinking?

Like literally. How do you not see the symptoms of a man-child when they are staring you dumb in the face? He literally is 25 and funneling beer in his snapchat story. How on Earth did that not scream “hasn’t left his college days behind”?

He was seeing you because he wants to relive those good old days in the basement of the Rugby House. You should’ve seen that coming when he made numerous comments about how he hated those “frat guys” but the guys on his team were his crew and how if he hadn’t fractured his shoulder, he could have gone pro or taken them to nationals.

Come on.

You’re not stupid. Stop acting stupid.

Also, stop dating pretty idiots. Sure, it was fun for a few months, but what lacks substance brings no worth to your life. And those boys lack so much substance.

Get your sh*t together girlfriend,

XO, Maz

To the Fan Interested in Reflection~

Question:

When you look in the mirror, what do you see?

Answer:

Thank you for this question.

When I look in the mirror, I see a woman, but I don’t see me.

I see blondish hair, blueish eyes, hips that might be a little too wide for some but work for me, nice lips, a killer pair of shoes, some blemishes and scars, eyebrows on fleek and other superficial things.

I stared at myself. I stared for a while. And I thought about how when someone doesn’t know me, that’s the first impression that they get. Only what they see.

When I look a little harder I notice other things too.

I see years of laughter in the lines near my mouth.

I see the future making me slouch by weighing down my shoulders.

I see bruises and cuts scattering my body from all the clumsy times I trip or walk into something.

I see a hint of skepticism in the purse of my lip.

I see a sadness in my eyes, which could be misdiagnosed as anger or detachment by a stranger.

I see how hard I work to try to look together most of the time, even when I’d rather be in my bed. Even when I’d rather be stuffing my face with pizza. Even when I’d rather look at videos of baby otters. Even when I just don’t want to see or speak or look at another human being for upwards of 3 years.

I see me.

XO, Maz

Questions, comments, concerns? Place them in my anonymous ask box:

http://ask.fm/mazforthefanz

To the Fan Who Wants to (Booty) Call Out~

Question:

How do I end a bad booty call situation?

Answer:

AYYYYYE. Good for you for getting that booty. Proud of you.

I’m also super sorry that it’s not going full speed ahead as planned.

I feel that I need to ask some follow up questions to give an appropriate answer to this question because as is, I’m not sure how to define “bad”.

So, in terms of just general badness, maybe they’re bad at sexy time, maybe there’s something bad about the situation, maybe you’re just over it, whatever the case may be, you owe this person nothing. They are a booty call, not your significant other. I don’t recommend just ghosting them. That is so rude. But a quick text explaining that: “hey, I’m not into this anymore” is a fair response. It leaves no real room for argument or whatever. It’s just an end. It’s short. It’s sweet. It’s to the point.

In terms of ending a booty call situation because somebody caught feelings, well that’s entirely different. This is not “Friends With Benefits”. You are not Justin Timberlake or Mila Kunis. If you’re trying to hook your booty call into a relationship, homie, you went about this all wrong. Relationships do not start with sex. Well, maybe a small percentage do, but for the most part, you probably want to get to know them first. Go on a day date, go to the park, learn something about them before you’re flying down the highway in an Uber back to their place with your pants half off.

But then again, a booty call situation never starts with the anticipation of feelings. So, I understand in a way. But if you’re the one who has the feelings, you either need to reality check and understand that this was a strictly sexual thing, cut ties and move on; or you have to tell the other person and maybe see if they reciprocate the feelings.

Or, on the flip side, if you are on the receiving end of the feels and you just really aren’t feeling it; again, don’t ghost. But you can respond by saying: “hey look, I thought that we both had a pretty clear idea of what this was going into and I’m just not looking for anything more, we should probably stop because I don’t want to lead you on.” That’s totally fair. It’s direct and yeah, it may sting them at first; but in the long run, you’re doing the right thing.

Keep it real, homies. Keep it real.

XO, Maz

Questions, comments, concerns? Place them in my anonymous ask box:

http://ask.fm/mazforthefanz

I Am So Julia Roberts Right Now

Honestly, nothing is more liberating than spending a day taking an adventure on your own. Since I’ve moved to London, I have more than fully embraced this mantra. At home, it might be weird if I wander into a restaurant by myself, here, I look chic as hell. I treat myself to a crepe at Crème de la Crepe in Covent Garden, or have a hearty meat pie from the Globe on Baker Street. No one thinks anything of it. No one says a thing about me being alone, no one even gives me a second glance. I am just left to my own thoughts and thorough enjoyment of my meal/reflection time.

It gives you a ton of time to think, when you don’t have wifi and don’t have another person to talk to. It gives me time to reflect on the fact that I am 20 years old, living the dream. I have limited responsibilities other than to go to class, complete class work and just fully enjoy my time in this wonderful place. On any given day, I could walk to see Big Ben and the Eye, or Buckingham Palace, or stroll through one of the numerous parks right out my back door. #casual

As I sit and write this, I am enjoying a glass of wine at the Fortune Theatre, awaiting the matinee show of “Woman In Black,” a show that I am seeing for homework. Literally my homework in one of my classes every week is to see a London Production, whether it is in the West End (London’s Broadway) or a tiny joint above a pub. This week it happened to be this show (which is now a movie starring Daniel Radcliffe). And much like having lunch or a walk by myself, no one has thought anything of me coming here alone. I am just enjoying my afternoon out, with limited interruptions. They even upgraded my seats from the back of the second tier balcony to the fourth row from the stage, now that’s what I call above and beyond service. Being unafraid to explore and get to know your city is the perfect excuse to stumble upon yourself at the same time. Just a little food for thought. XOXO, Maz.